I've Just Realized
by SilverPegasus
Summary: Brennan regrets what he's done.


OK..this is in first person form, and you know him well.  
You will probably know who he's talking about, so I don't need  
to give anything away, Please Read and Review, it's only my second  
fic and Would like to like know if I should keep writing or not.  
  
I've Just Realized  
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I look at her and I realize I don't love her, Don't get me wrong,  
I love her just like a friend would, but Nothing more.  
All the time I was with her, It felt wrong, I think we both knew why.  
My heart belonged to another, the one person who had my heart from the start.  
She's the only one who truely understands me. She's the only one who's ever   
had my heart for real.  
  
I know I love her, and It's taken me this long to realize it, I know...correction  
I knew how she felt about me, I'm not so sure if she still does love me after what   
I did to her, she told me she loved me, and being the idiot I am, told Her that   
I didn't love her in that way, but of course then I thought I was in love with the  
one I just realised I don't love, does that make sense?.  
  
I truely am a idiot, no need to tell me twice, he who said "you don't know what  
you've lost until you lose it" was right. I realise with full pain what I've lost  
and I'm paying the price, but as They say, I've made my bed now I must lie in it.  
Everyday I kick myself for making my best friend, the one I love deal with this   
heartache when we both could be happy right now.  
  
I just want to see her happy again, and I don't care how that happens.  
If she found someone else to make her happy, then I'd be happy..  
It just doesn't mean That I wouldn't have a problem with it, I'd just   
keep that to myself. But personally and honestly, I want to be the one   
that puts a smile back on her face, I'd make it my problem to.  
  
It's been awhile since I've seen her happy, And that just really get's me, I know  
sadness does not suit her, I miss her smile, the one that would make my heart jump  
I'd give anything to see her lips curve into a smile again, just like I'd give up  
anything to be able to take her in my arms and never let go, I'd mark her as mine  
with non-stop kisses or until both of us need air.  
  
I haven't seen her for awhile, another realisation on my part, and I know why,   
she needs time to herself and I'll give her that, I owe her so much more and   
I intend to pay up, ten times more if I have to, I know I won't let her go,  
second time around, I made a mistake, I am still only human no matter what my  
mutant ability is. The best thing about making a mistake is learning from it  
and I'd assure everyone that I have.   
  
It's been two weeks since I told her that I didn't love her,   
it seems alot longer then that, or maybe it's because the guilt is eating me alive.  
I want to tell her I made a mistake, tell her I love her even if she bestows the  
same treatment I bestowed upon her, it wouldn't matter, personally I wouldn't mind  
feeling the same way she does, I deserve that and much much more.  
  
The one that I love with all my heart, walks down the stairs, she seems to ignore me  
then lifts her head to adknowledge that I'm there, she doesn't look like the same  
woman that I fell in love with, she's much to heartbroken and My stomach forms a knot  
"I'm going out, you want to come with me" she asks and I know she's only inviting me   
to be polite, and I shake my head, she needs to be alone, and I need to gain her trust  
again.  
  
"Oh well, Maybe another time" She states and I know that in a way she didn't mean that.  
She walks out the front door and I watch her go, shoulders slumped in defeat,   
I could tell she was on the verge of giving up, and I hated that I was the one   
that made her like that, oh How I missed the sparks that made her who she was.  
  
I wished there and then for another chance, I wished that she would look at me  
like she used to when we first met, she had love radiating from her whole being,  
But once again I didn't even realize it, and I just realised it now.  
  
Adam gave me hope and strength today, he informed me how much this was hurting him   
and hurting the team, and most of all,how this was affecting me and her.  
I sighed, I already knew I was a idiot, he didn't have to rub it in.  
Adam told me how much she still loved me despite the pain I caused her, he told   
me that she would always love me and I didn't know how he knew, but he was the genius.  
I thanked him and made a vow somehow I was going to make it up to her.  
  
I was going to erase the pain that was etched on her face, I didn't know how,   
I didn't know when she would allow me to, but I knew I wasn't giving up on her.  
One day It was going to be Brennan And Emma for always  
  
The End  
  
Please review, I may write a sequel if anyone wants one.   
Heh I've just realized that I have not wrote one happy Brennan/Emma fic, so  
maybe If I write a sequel it be happier.  
  
Thanks  
Silver^Pegasus 


End file.
